Comments on: How to say NO and have people respect you for it http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/ feeding your inner rebel Wed, 08 Feb 2012 12:41:56 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: jade sm http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-2510 jade sm Sat, 14 May 2011 18:43:54 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-2510 let your no be no and let your yes be yes. let your no be no and let your yes be yes.

]]> By: Jeffrey Bennett http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-2330 Jeffrey Bennett Thu, 31 Mar 2011 20:11:01 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-2330 Great article! I know it was difficult for me to learn to say "no," but it's truly been an invaluable lesson in life and in business. Thank you for reinforcing that knowledge. Great article! I know it was difficult for me to learn to say “no,” but it’s truly been an invaluable lesson in life and in business. Thank you for reinforcing that knowledge.

]]> By: Joe http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-1550 Joe Fri, 10 Sep 2010 09:42:19 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-1550 Thanks you for your post.Even i am having the same issue of difficulty in saying no to others.Right now i am in such a situation where i dont want to do a work cause i know it will go in vane, but because the other person who is friend of mine who insist on me doing that, i agreed to do it. But in halfway i find that this work is impossible because of the lack of information and in-capabilities.Now i wanted to say no to him , but if i say now "NO" it would screw our friendship.After reading this post i took courage and called him,didnt answer my call though. i hope i continue with my courage to say "NO" to what i cannot do and which doesnt comes under my responsibility. I am a "people Pleaser". Difference between me and others is that i come to know about the other's "YES or NO" even without them saying it to me,i kind of understand others quickly and i expect others to be so with me, but they arent. In most of the cases where i wanted to say "NO" i would say that it is difficult and now i am busy and so on, but others insist on me doing that work for them, thats where the problem kicks in. if i was in their shoes would say " ITS OK I WOULD FIND SOME OTHER AND IF YOU COME TO KNOW ANYONE WHO CAN DO THIS JOB PLEASE LET ME KNOW".The other fellow doesnt understand that i am trying to say no , and i cannot say no because he is my friend. Please post back reply for this as i dont want to be a people pleaser. forgive me for any bad english. Thanks you for your post.Even i am having the same issue of difficulty in saying no to others.Right now i am in such a situation where i dont want to do a work cause i know it will go in vane, but because the other person who is friend of mine who insist on me doing that, i agreed to do it. But in halfway i find that this work is impossible because of the lack of information and in-capabilities.Now i wanted to say no to him , but if i say now “NO” it would screw our friendship.After reading this post i took courage and called him,didnt answer my call though. i hope i continue with my courage to say “NO” to what i cannot do and which doesnt comes under my responsibility.
I am a “people Pleaser”.
Difference between me and others is that i come to know about the other’s “YES or NO” even without them saying it to me,i kind of understand others quickly and i expect others to be so with me, but they arent. In most of the cases where i wanted to say “NO” i would say that it is difficult and now i am busy and so on, but others insist on me doing that work for them, thats where the problem kicks in. if i was in their shoes would say ” ITS OK I WOULD FIND SOME OTHER AND IF YOU COME TO KNOW ANYONE WHO CAN DO THIS JOB PLEASE LET ME KNOW”.The other fellow doesnt understand that i am trying to say no , and i cannot say no because he is my friend.

Please post back reply for this as i dont want to be a people pleaser.

forgive me for any bad english.

]]> By: Derek Padula - The Dao of Dragon Ball http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-1201 Derek Padula - The Dao of Dragon Ball Thu, 04 Feb 2010 21:42:50 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-1201 Thank you for a very logical and emotionally sensitive post. No is definitely something I need to practice. I feel like a leader in heart, but then I react to others requests that I am not available for by saying Yes, so I don't ruffle any feathers. However, I'm not being honest with myself or them and I'm not enduring the hardship of listening to my inner voice and following it. Following your true self is where true leaders are born, I believe. The more I practice that, the better off I will be. Thanks again. Thank you for a very logical and emotionally sensitive post. No is definitely something I need to practice. I feel like a leader in heart, but then I react to others requests that I am not available for by saying Yes, so I don’t ruffle any feathers. However, I’m not being honest with myself or them and I’m not enduring the hardship of listening to my inner voice and following it. Following your true self is where true leaders are born, I believe. The more I practice that, the better off I will be. Thanks again.

]]> By: Rose http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-819 Rose Sat, 21 Nov 2009 21:10:54 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-819 I just now remembered when my kids (as toddlers) started saying 'no' back to me. I must have said it a lot for them to have learned it and used it in the right context. My response back then was to be "the boss", after all who did this little midget think they were saying "no" to the illustrious leader! So (although I can't recall exactly how I dealt with it), I let them know in no uncertain terms that you didn't challenge authority. They learned that saying "no" didn't pay. And I think most people learn this self same lesson very early in life. I think a lot of our reluctance to say no comes from remembering the punishment (the parent's ruffled feathers, the smack, rejection ... the whole energy of what saying "no" can bring. And so we become a society of "yes" men, even when we want to say no. And further, get ourselves frustrated, angry and resentful doing stuff we often don't really want to do! A "yes" is great when it's authentic. Practice the "no". No thanks. Maybe next time. I just now remembered when my kids (as toddlers) started saying ‘no’ back to me. I must have said it a lot for them to have learned it and used it in the right context.

My response back then was to be “the boss”, after all who did this little midget think they were saying “no” to the illustrious leader! So (although I can’t recall exactly how I dealt with it), I let them know in no uncertain terms that you didn’t challenge authority. They learned that saying “no” didn’t pay. And I think most people learn this self same lesson very early in life.

I think a lot of our reluctance to say no comes from remembering the punishment (the parent’s ruffled feathers, the smack, rejection … the whole energy of what saying “no” can bring.

And so we become a society of “yes” men, even when we want to say no. And further, get ourselves frustrated, angry and resentful doing stuff we often don’t really want to do!

A “yes” is great when it’s authentic.

Practice the “no”.

No thanks. Maybe next time.

]]> By: Giving Up Commitments and Saying No to New Ones — Aliventures http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-818 Giving Up Commitments and Saying No to New Ones — Aliventures Thu, 17 Sep 2009 10:13:52 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-818 [...] (How to say NO and have people respect you for it, How to Be An Original) [...] [...] (How to say NO and have people respect you for it, How to Be An Original) [...]

]]> By: Michael@ Awareness * Connection http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-817 Michael@ Awareness * Connection Wed, 03 Sep 2008 07:06:44 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-817 A hugely important skill, being able to say no with grace and authenticity. I enjoyed seeing yes and no's broken down into the six combinations. This is a great post, as making sure your time and attention is spent on what you value most can only be done by saying no to extraneous requests. <abbr>Michael@ Awareness * Connection's last blog post..<a href="http://enjoyparenting.blogspot.com/2008/08/save-words-for-happy-times-part-ii.html" rel="nofollow">Save the Words for the Happy Times, Part II</a></abbr> A hugely important skill, being able to say no with grace and authenticity. I enjoyed seeing yes and no’s broken down into the six combinations. This is a great post, as making sure your time and attention is spent on what you value most can only be done by saying no to extraneous requests.

Michael@ Awareness * Connection’s last blog post..Save the Words for the Happy Times, Part II

]]> By: Salim http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-816 Salim Wed, 13 Aug 2008 18:35:26 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-816 "Seek first to understand and then to be understood". That I believe is the key in deciding whether to say NO. Understand the requestor's need, situation and position and then seek to explain him your decision and reasoning. Nice article. “Seek first to understand and then to be understood”. That I believe is the key in deciding whether to say NO. Understand the requestor’s need, situation and position and then seek to explain him your decision and reasoning.

Nice article.

]]> By: Emy http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-815 Emy Wed, 18 Jun 2008 08:28:01 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-815 The word 'NO'is always hard for me. Any time I'm afraid to offence the people and avoid 'NO'. BUt now it is time to learn how to say'NO' and your post will be of great usage. Thanks The word ‘NO’is always hard for me. Any time I’m afraid to offence the people and avoid ‘NO’. BUt now it is time to learn how to say’NO’ and your post will be of great usage. Thanks

]]> By: Glimmerick » Blog Archive » What are you waiting for? http://beanoriginal.net/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it/#comment-814 Glimmerick » Blog Archive » What are you waiting for? Mon, 09 Jun 2008 08:39:40 +0000 http://blog.lodewijkvdb.com/2008/02/how-to-say-no-and-have-people-respect-you-for-it.html#comment-814 [...] to minimize these activities, learn to say “No” if you are feeling overwhelmed with [...] [...] to minimize these activities, learn to say “No” if you are feeling overwhelmed with [...]

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